Even the Patriots are tied for first
Week 1 in Tecmo is never very exciting. The MAN teams usually crush the computer teams by eighty and the auto-skipped games deliver all of their lifeless flair to us in a convenient twenty second bundle. But this might be different. Since I'm paying closer attention now, this could turn out to be quite interesting. Check out the game of the week below, which features a preview of my NFC Championship. And after that, stroll through the rest of the league to see who was hot, who was not, and who was incredibly boring.
Cincinnati Bengals (0-0) vs. Denver Broncos (0-0)
Cincinnati had a 14-7 first quarter lead when they suffered the season's first injury: The loss of halfback James Brooks. The Broncos took advantage of the Bengals hurt feelings and slow Ickey as they tied it up before halftime at 14-14. They ended up stealing the game on a fourth quarter drive by Mr. John Elway that netted the Broncos the first win of the season.
Final Score: Denver-21 Cincinnati-14
Indianapolis Colts (0-0) vs. New England Patriots (0-0)
I was all set to watch this game just for personal enjoyment, but then a buddy called and said he wanted me to help him watch some snow melt. After a few hours of that I returned and saw that the Colts had won this game 21-20, but the real winners were the Leonardites who found other more enjoyable diversions on this day.
Final Score: Indianapolis-21 New England-20
Detroit Lions (0-0) vs. Washington Redskins (0-0)
Now granted, I do have the Redskins making the playoffs, and I have the Lions spending the month of January with their loved ones, but even I didn't see this coming. The Redskins stormed out to a 21-7 first quarter lead and kept pouring it on, as they beat the hell out of the Lions 49-7. The Redskins gained valuable insight on offense as Earnest Byner gained them 163 yards, and they also gained valuable experience on defense as Rodney Peete lobbed them the ball four times.
Final Score: Washington-49 Detroit-7
Pittsburgh Steelers (0-0) vs. San Diego Chargers (0-0)
It's hard to put an exciting tagline on a wide-margin game between the Chargers and the Steelers. This 35-14 snoozefest produced no injuries, big games statistically, or feelings of personal enjoyment within my disinterested brain.
Final Score: Pittsburgh-35 San Diego-14
Cleveland Browns (0-0) vs. Dallas Cowboys (0-0)
The Cowboys put up two touchdowns in the first half and then held off a very unexciting comeback of leads and field goals by the Browns. Kevin Mack and Emmitt Smith produced identical rushing statitistics, which meant that both teams had identically pathetic ground games.
Final Score: Dallas-14 Cleveland-13
Houston Oilers (0-0) vs. Los Angeles Raiders (0-0)
The Oilers scored early and often enough as they defeated the eternally-confusing Los Angeles Raiders. Warren Moon used pure intimidation and talent to put up 257 yards passing. Bo Jackson checked in and put up 93 on the ground, but then left early to take part in a baseball game featured on a travel Tiger handheld.
Final Score: Houston-24 Los Angeles-14
Buffalo Bills (0-0) vs. Miami Dolphins (0-0)
Spurred on by Ferrell Edmunds' 136 receiving yards, decent human beings everywhere rejoiced as the Dolphins topped the Bills, 23-21. The rematch, usually marred by blatant cheating and Game Genie-like effects, will most likely produce a more typically disgusting result.
Final Score: Miami-23 Buffalo-21
Atlanta Falcons (0-0) vs. Kansas City Chiefs (0-0)
Kansas City busted out to a 23-0 lead and then gave the Falcons a fourth quarter charity touchdown in claiming a 23-7 victory. Chris Miller was his typical, shitty self as he threw up three interceptions. Mike Rozier did a nice job of picking up the slack, though, as he raced all over the field for 27 yards.
Final Score: Kansas City-23 Atlanta-7
New York Jets (0-0) vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-0)
In the game with two long team names, Ken O.Brien stopped sucking for one game and went off for 246 yards. The Buccaneers found the end zone a few times, but found that their new technique of not using a protective line on PAT attempts might be a bit more flawed than it looks on paper. And on paper, it looks like the worst idea ever used in an NFL game.
Final Score: New York Jets-31 Tampa Bay-12
New Orleans Saints (0-0) vs. Seattle Seahawks (0-0)
New Orleans scored a late TD to edge the Seahawks, 14-10. The defense both proved to be pretty solid in this highly-contested game that features one team who would be a division champion if not for San Francisco, and another team who wouldn't be a division champion if not for an unbelievably beneficial programming glitch.
Final Score: New Orleans-14 Seattle-10
Green Bay Packers (0-0) vs. Philadelphia Eagles (0-0)
When Keith Byars is Philly's leading rusher, you know they're in trouble. When Byars has 33 yards, you know they're completely screwed. Such was the case in this 21-16 Philadelphia loss. Don Majkowski tried his best to give it away with three interceptions, but QB Eagles was just as successful it returning the favor by tossing three of his own.
Final Score: Green Bay-21 Philadelphia-16
Chicago Bears (0-0) vs. Minnesota Vikings (0-0)
Neal Anderson was the second casualty of the week, going down early in the first quarter. You'd think that this would doom the Bears, especially when Brad Muster finished in the team lead with 34 yards, but Jim Harbaugh forgot who he was and completed 75% of his passes in this improbable Chicago victory.
Final Score: Chicago-30 Minnesota-21
Los Angeles Rams (0-0) vs. Phoenix Cardinals (0-0)
Perhaps spurred on by my total disrespect of them, the LA Rams scored the last two touchdowns of the game to win 28-17. But more likely, they were spurred on by the fact that Phoenix is one of the worst collections of human football players in the history of planet Earth.
Final Score: Los Angeles Rams-28 Phoenix-17
Player of the Week
Even though he did get to play Rodney Peete, those are still some pretty unbelievable numbers.
James Brooks-CIN (Week 1)
Neal Anderson- CHI (Week 1)
Coming next week...
- Week 2 results
- Player of the Week
-Game of the Week: New Orleans vs. Kansas City