Yes, the Patriots and Colts have done nothing to tarnish their legacy in this campaign
Three weeks to go and the Tecmo community sits in a breathless state of anticipation, wondering just how this incredible season is going to finally shake down. Now that I have used way more superlatives and exaggerations than are necessary to describe a simmed Tecmo season, we can get down to the meat of Week 15. There's going to be two more weeks after this one, but 15 and 16 usually provide the most drama as the most number of divisions are clinched here. And the drama is so thick surrounding this phenomenal season, that it would take a two foot-thick machete to cut through it. So much for staying away from the exaggerations.
Kansas City (8-5) vs. San Diego (4-9)
With Kansas City clinging to a one game lead on both Denver and Seattle, surely they wouldn't lay an egg against lowly San Diego would they? Before you could spell "Caravello," that's exactly what happened.
Final Score: San Diego-21 Kansas City-17
Phoenix (4-9) vs. Washington (7-6)
It took overtime and a long bargaining session with Earnest Byner convincing him trade away his fumbling rights, but the Redskins pulled this game out. Whereas the Chiefs blew their game against a 4-9 stepsister, the suddenly formidable Redskins took advantage of the opportunity.
Final Score: Washington-20 Phoenix-17 (OT)
Cincinnati (6-7) vs. Miami (10-2)
Dan Marino threw for 288 and the Dolphins brutally disfigured James Brooks en route to their victory. Absolutely nobody was disappointed with their savage actions because they, for a fleeting moment, have delayed the Bills' inevitable clinching of the AFC East.
Final Score: Miami-31 Cincinnati-17
Detroit (5-8) vs. New York Jets (6-7)
The regiment of waving nurses couldn't help the returning Barry Sanders win the game, nor could they keep Ken O. from completing a whopping 90% of his throws in this indisputably meaningless game.
Final Score: New York-21 Detroit-14
Buffalo (11-2) vs. Los Angeles Raiders (6-7)
The oft-injured James Lofton gave the Bills a boost with his return as Buffalo helped deliver an almost fatal blow to Los Angeles's not-really-there playoff hopes. But thanks to Miami's victory earlier in the day, we are spared the perverse Buffalo celebration scene for one more week.
Final Score: Buffalo-34 Los Angeles-23
New York Giants (11-2) vs. Philadelphia (8-5)
This was the third straight game with players pouring out of the infirmary, this time with Kenny Jackson and David Meggett. Jackson, the little used Philadelphia receiver, was more of an inspiration to his teammates apparently and the Giants will also have to wait until a later date to clinch their division.
Final Score: Philadelphia-28 New York-24
Minnesota (5-8) vs. Tampa Bay (3-10)
Nobody cares about this game or its identical score to its predecessor, but the 323 yards, 78% completion percentage, and absolutely no interceptions by Wade Wilson are just not natural.
Final Score: Minnesota-28 Tampa Bay-24
Houston (9-4) vs. Pittsburgh (5-8)
Houston made it a clinching 0 for 3 by getting drubbed by a very disappointing Pittsburgh team. There were no interesting stat lines from this game, and judging by Houston's offensive scarcity, probably no interesting Moon sneaks either.
Final Score: Pittsburgh-27 Houston-7
Chicago (7-6) vs. Green Bay (8-5)
In the biggest game of the week, Green Bay pulled away in the NFC Central by edging their opponent in the NFL's longest-running rivalry. With Mark Carrier and company not able to get their mitts on any of Don Ma;oasdlkfjasdf's passes, the Bears are firmly in Wild Card limbo right now.
Final Score: Green Bay-28 Chicago-21
Dallas (8-5) vs. New Orleans (7-6)
The Saints had crawled back into playoff contention, but were systematically served by a similarly playoff-hungry Dallas team. Babe Laufenberg sightings were negligble, but the crowd's undying affection and yearning for him were not.
Final Score: Dallas-27 New Orleans-10
Cleveland (6-7) vs. Denver (7-6)
Vance Johnson's six catches not only pulled Denver into a tie for first in the AFC West, but they also buried the rest of the Central as Houston clinched with the Cleveland loss.
Final Score: Denver-35 Cleveland-17
San Francisco (10-3) vs. Seattle (7-6)
San Fran clinched the NFC West which is exciting, but not nearly as exciting as the fact that the guy right behind their coach in the celebratory picture was apparently issued two helmets.
Final Score: San Francisco-21 Seattle-14
Atlanta (6-7) vs. Los Angeles Rams (7-6)
Jim Everett got over the 49er-Clinching Blues to complete 84% of his passes in a fourth quarter comeback over the now-done Atlanta Falcons.
Final Score: Los Angeles-24 Atlanta-14
Player of the Week
I was going to go with Wade Wilson for his superb week, but Jason Staurovsky's heroics in the Toilet Bowl are going to lead him into being the first kicker to earn this honor in the Leonardite.com Tecmo season.
Marvin Allen- NE
James Brooks- CIN
Mike Rozier- ATL
Anthony Toney- PHI (Week 14)
Wendell Davis- CHI (Week 14)
Joe Montana- SF (Week 14)
Keith Byars- PHI (Week 13)
Herschel Walker- MIN (Week 13)
Kenny Jackson- PHI (Week 14)
James Lofton- BUF (Week 13)
David Meggett- GIA (Week 13)
Barry Sanders- DET (Week 13)
Coming next week...
- Week 16 results
- Player of the Week
-Game of the Week: Dallas vs. Philadelphia