Neil says:

I admit I haven't been to a lot of ten year-old girls basketball games lately, but God help me, I doubt they're having a lot of trouble with them making too many baskets.

Dan says:

Usually when a person writes in the third person they say something grand such as: "I, Sarah G. Smith, am going to be president." But no, she totally degrades herself and mankind by proclaiming she is going to be a girls’ basketball player. That’s like me saying I want to torture cats when I get older, only way worse.
Poll Question: "Should the hoop be lowered for kids' basketball games?"